Monday, October 3, 2011
My job would be enabling and empowering all around me to be their highest and best while achieving their dream!
An observer commented about one of his peers. He said, "Your style of leadership is directional. You tell. You leave no space for creativity and personal potential. And if people should disagree, then what?"
I was taken aback. If that wasn't judgmental, what was? It seemed to me the accuser was guilty of the same!
That encounter made me think. What exactly is my leadership style - am I also directional?
Am I consultative? Or would others see me as weak --- wishy - washy. Directionless!
Worse still and heaven forbid, selfish. Was I all about ME???
So I read a "Crash Course" on LEADERSHIP by Walk The Talk, a favorite website of mine.
The 10 most important words:
“What can I do to help you be more successful?”
The 9 most important words:
“I need you to do this, and here’s why…”
The 8 most important words:
“That’s my mistake and I will fix it.”
The 7 most important words:
“My door is always open to you.”
The 6 most important words:
“Let’s focus on solving the problem.”
The 5 most important words:
“You did a great job!”
The 4 most important words:
“What do YOU think?”
The 3 most important words:
“Follow my lead.”
The 2 most important words:
The MOST important word:
And so as I step back from myself and know that if my intention is all about being my best and living my highest potential, there's a dance I must do. Before I become an expert dancer, there are steps and stages, attitudes and beliefs I need to change, levels of fitness I must groom within my mind-body-emotion, that will allow me to be all that I want to be:
Flexible / Graceful / Strong / before I get to live from that Inspired platform.
Hey! I wanted to talk about leadership and I've ended up talking about myself. Odd? Not really.
For no one can really inspire leadership if one cannot lead themselves.
For who would follow anyone un-inspiring? Who would give up time for anything weaker than themselves?
Sunday, October 2, 2011
At first, you're cool. It's fine. Things'll get better, you think. The Universe has a plan. Two months down the track and you're still struggling with the same stuff, only now you're worn down and your head feels like it's about to burst. You're wearing your heart around your knees at the minute and think, "heck, what the hell's wrong with me?" Only there's nothing wrong with you, it's the rest of the world.
Define "going so badly?" Well, stuff happening that doesn't fit with my self-image. I'm not Mother Teresa you know. Church says, love thy neighbor. Forgive thine enemy. Heck, that's difficult stuff. After all, I'm spirit trapped in this body so that I can experience thought as feeling and for that I've been given the physical form. Not easy Papa. (I'm looking heavenward) Can barely understand, let alone do.
Where is the guilt coming from? Who's doing the actual punishing? I'm looking around and going, How come the guys that don't have conscience are getting away with murder? Sociopaths all. They're having fun. So unfair. Steal from me. Lie to me. Bad-mouth me. Use me. And get off scott free.
If I were operating from a higher consciousness, what would I be doing/thinking? I'm thinking --- how can I be less affected by all this shit? People will be people. Crooks will do what crooks do. Is it my job to change them? Couldn't if I tried.
What then? Organize myself so I don't stress with nonsense. Allow. Let people be. Let them be who they are; express themselves in the way they best know how - even if its not like me. Go back to the place where I know all things are just. Go back to Source where all things are one.
Cease the separation of good v bad, the duality of right and wrong, light and dark, pure and corrupt.
For what is not of God is an illusion. What is not of God is unreal. So I will adjust my thoughts so that I can experience the right kind of emotion --- The definition of emotion is: thought attached to a feeling. Yes, that's what I'll do. That's what I'll work on from now on.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Others need independence ~ in being their own boss, managing their own time. Independence is their adrenaline. Freedom and flexibility keeps their heart pumping; keeps them feeling alive.
Some people can manage life, living paycheck to paycheck. Others want more ~ more challenge, more variety, more experience, more choice. It's like a journey of self-discovery; seeing how far you can go, and how much you need to take you there.
It's more difficult for a wage earner to be wealthy. We're talking high net worth. Unless one owns stock options, has the ear of the boss, and access to the corporate jet, life would be pretty well laid out for the professional man. One needs to be an entrepreneur, investor, and risk-taker of a higher order if one wishes to live among the top 5% of society's rich and famous. Or you could marry into there.
Today the financial markets are volatile to say the least. Fear and uncertainty have wreaked havoc. The US rating downgrade, the Debt Ceiling issue, the European financial crisis have all contributed to the chaos. So how? What to do with your money? How to make some ~ at a time like this?
How to maintain calm and logic; that's how the experts say to remain in control of your (life) finances. Preserving financial independence is the objective. Too many people have "caved" and fallen victims to stress, depression, worthlessness and self-loathing because of the mistakes made. Have you suffered any of these?
In the midst of financial chaos, what factors remain certain? What can we count on? Despite the dim economic outlook, Asia and the emerging markets will lead growth and recovery.
As long as investors put their money behind companies that sell goods and services that have strong brand positioning they need not fear.
As long as investors put their money behind EU and US cos that are selling goods and services with strong branding in Asia and the emerging markets, they need not fear.
To reduce risk, investors must learn to hedge should markets drop. Here are some strategies:
(a) Buy safe haven currencies
(b) Buy precious metals
(c) Buy top quality defensive sector companies that are plugged into Asia and the emerging
markets. Essential services such as food, healthcare, and natural resources.
(d) Buy bonds - physical or ETFs
(e) Buy into the Chicago Board of Trade Volatility Index (VIX)
Why am I mad about money? No money no talk. No money no best life.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Traveling to Grand Junction Colorado USA was an experience. Firstly we are in the throes of post 911 paranoia where security is so tight they want to squeeze you out of everything including your shoes. Then one has to remember Colorado is the mile high state because its capital Denver sits a mile high above sea level. Colorado is also tornado country. Arriving at Denver airport, I noticed their tornado shelters were also the men's and ladies' rooms!
By the time I arrived Grand Junction Country Inns, I had flown through Singapore, London, Denver, and then some. Luckily the conference delegates were warm, cool, and hot ~ this all rolled into one! *How fascinating!*
Wonderful weather. Lovely people and stimulating learning. *How fantastic!*
Looking forward to the next Int'l NS Conference ~ this time hosted by Kuala Lumpur in 2013.
So time to plan your holiday. Get ready to enjoy Malaysian hospitality ~ fine food, great adventure, and the best coach training in the world.
See pictures of Grand Junction ~ my first glimpse from inside the airport. Country Inns Conference Center. My presentation titled: Book Yourself Solid.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
What does this festival mean?
Firstly it means reuniting with spirit, after "going within" to search and connect with those who are less fortunate than ourselves. It means realizing our fallibility and forgiving those who have hurt us, as we have hurt others --- through our mindlessness. It means "going without" the things we want in honor of the things we have.
It is a time for reuniting --- with family, honoring our elders, and returning to the place from where we originated. That place is love. That place is a place of peace. Because we are spirit and spirit is about love. Spirit is about peace.
Within each one of us is that tranquil place. In the midst of chaos do you know where to go for peace and love and calm?
7-up, Coke, and Sprite will work to have you believe Raya is about quenching your thirst on your journey to there. Kentucky Fried Chicken and McDonald's will certainly have a go at pushing their finger licking goodness. But "Raya" (celebrate) is not about food and drink or money or stuff at all.
Raya is about finding oneself. It's about going home --- to Self. It's about prioritizing. Distinguishing what's truly important from what's worldly and superficial. Raya is about actualizing --- Self.
Who are you? What are you made of?
Do you know where you're going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? Do you know?
Sunday, August 14, 2011
The vision is so that people everywhere have access to this human technology that allows them to live their best life. Yes, it is our singular purpose in this life to be happy. Yes, that technology is available. And yes, we all can be happy as long as we choose to. Just as soon as we know how to access that state. Or gestalt of states that = happy ;-)
What is the mission? To inspire courage, confidence, freedom.
Courage as opposed to fear. Fear as opposed to lack of love.
Confidence as opposed to playing small, staying weak, apathetic. Confidence for stepping out as we are. Just the way we are.
Freedom from what? Freedom from our upbringing, our conditioning, our past, our limitations. Freedom to choose the life we want. Freedom to sing our song. Our song.
The goal, the objective, is to go among the masses. The work is to bring the message to everyone --- men, women, children and everyone in between. Just as fear does not discriminate, love must not discriminate. The challenge is to give love unconditionally. The job is to include and embrace and distribute.
When? As soon as possible. We are faced with unprecedented economic chaos. This has upset the family dynamic where men who have been breadwinners are now facing psychic, not just emotional and financial upset --- because their ability to provide and protect is challenged. So family systems are being overturned. Families are suffering loss, grief, separation --- from Self --- when needs are not sufficiently met.
Apart from financial struggle, emotional and psychic disturbance, relational upset, our world is under attack from the flagging ethical and moral fiber that threatens to break up social structure, law and order, and on a larger scale, the health of the human spirit. In this case, fear spreads. Fear is the opposite of love. Fear is the result of the separation from Self.
There is much work to do. For this work we need all hands on board. Women and children, pick up your tools. Even if this is the warmth of your embrace, the calmness in your voice, and the softness of your bosom.
What work exactly? Go out into the cities and towns and make every soul feel like they are important, make them feel like they belong.
This is the work. This is the calling. This is our purpose.
Beyond this, nothing matters.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
When S&P downgraded the US from AAA to AA, Moody’s defended the US’ triple-A status. Fascinating. I think this presents Malaysia with a unique opportunity to lead. I think it’s time for Asia and the emerging markets to combine forces and expertise to create our own neutral rating agency.
America didn’t confront their problems sooner and now the gap seems too wide for any single president to fix. Europe is stressed and in disarray. Do we want to wait for crisis levels before we act? Why not start now to increase domestic – led consumption and exports to Asia, the emerging, and frontier markets. Buy Malaysian. Promote Malaysian – made. Act now.
Let’s you and I stand up for our economy. Let’s champion Brand Malaysia.
Let’s collaborate with China, India, Africa, and our Latin American friends. Let’s form joint venture alliances to scour the planet for products and services that these huge consumer nations seek and desire. When companies see demand surging for Malaysian – made goods and services will they be inspired to produce more, and produce quality. Everybody wins.
Under the US Dodd – Frank law that was proposed on 2 Dec 2009, there’s the Volcker rule. By this rule, depository banks are prohibited from proprietary trading, meaning they can’t trade with their own funds, only with clients’ money.
Banks forced to curb trading means money looking for new places to go… This gives Malaysia a brilliant opportunity to attract global funds. It’s time for us to modernize our trading systems. We’re well – poised as one of the world’s foremost Islamic Banking centers.
“In the near future I envisage that the Yuan will become the safe haven currency of Asia. Later, the Yuan together with other emerging market currencies such as the Brazilian Rial, Russian Ruble, Indian Rupee, and South African Rand will be in one big gold – backed basket,” predicts Ashwin M Binwani Wealth Strategist at Peak Prosperity Consulting Hong Kong Ltd.
(That means Americans can’t simply print money; create Quantitative Easing 2 and 3 without backing it with a measure of gold!)
Malaysia is in a sweet spot as our Ringgit is the proxy currency for the Chinese Yuan. In fact when the Yuan appreciates, all Asian currencies follow suit.
The entire matrix of business and finance has shifted to the East. It’s time for Malaysians to develop more courage and confidence. Why not use this time to perfect our systems and take measures to decouple from the West. For this to happen our financial and political groundwork must be honed and refined.
Malaysia has a lot going for itself. At this point the stakes are high and primarily we’ve got 2 choices. We can work to do ourselves proud. Or we can let ourselves down. I say we stand for unity. Think National Pride.
I say peace will secure prosperity.
China is currently holding more than US$ 800 billion of US treasuries. If a ratings downgrade takes place, China and other investors would be tempted to sell their USD bond holdings. Should the US dollar collapse, the market would probably hedge by buying metals such as gold and silver, and invest in Asian and emerging market currencies like Singapore dollar, Malaysian Ringgit, Korean Won, Thai Baht, Indonesian Rupiah, Chinese Yuan, Australian dollar, and Brazilian Rial.
On Fri 8 Jul the Bloomberg – JP Morgan Asia Dollar Index rose to a 14-year high. In the 5 days leading to July 8, global funds pumped more than USD 1.9 billion into South Korean, Thai and Indonesian equities, Exchange data has showed. The increase in demand for Asian and emerging market equities has increased the demand for its currencies.
Moral of the story: Any exporter wanting to succeed must redesign and realign its market strategy to suit Asia and the emerging markets.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
The Tao Te Ching: To achieve greatness we need do nothing. We are perfect as we are.
We are as God made us, and God doesn't make mistakes.
We are made perfectly for the tasks we are to perform on this Earth and that is to love God with all our heart, all our mind, all our strength. Not for God's sake, but for our own.
The Tao Te Ching: Think Small. Stay low.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Stay low --- like the ocean --- where all great rivers must flow into you.
Jesus spoke 500 years later. He said, "The meek shall inherit the Earth."
Lao Tzu, or "old man," regarded as the most learned man on the planet, wrote this 500 years B.C. His contemporaries were other self-realized beings like Buddha, Confusius in the East and Plato, Socrates, Euripedes in the West.
King Solomon of the Old Testament does not refute this. In fact, in his writings, King Solomon celebrates love of self and love of other. Pages are dedicated to this through his verse.
Jesus quotes Lao Tzu almost word for word in His sermons on the mount. The Tao Te Ching is the 2nd - most translated book in the world after the Bible.
"A Course in Miracles" --- another spiritual text says, "At the last judgment, God will tell us how He really feels about us, and finally... we will know how magnificent we are..."
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Some people get to lead because they've lobbied over time for a title or a position. Some people get there because they have a skill, they've served many years, or they own the company. But this doesn't make them a good leader.
Many confuse managing with leading.
"If I follow a system or a process, I'm a leader. If things don't change, it things don't go wrong, I'll be okay. Just make sure people in my team don't give trouble. Keep everything safe and my position will be secure."
They think, "I'm the leader so you'd better listen to what I say. Or else!" They spare no time thinking --- What type of person must I be so that others will have confidence in me, respect me? What kind of behavior must I demonstrate so that I will inspire confidence, camaraderie, cohesion?
So off they go, banging around. They go about - unaware of how they leave a wake of confusion, often fear behind them.
How does a (real) leader handle conflict? Do they ignore it and hope it will go away? What's the job of a leader anyway? What's the ultimate desired outcome? How many actually think about what results they must produce (other than fame, popularity, further promotion and other "tribal" attractions)
One of the fundamental roles of a leader is to turn a group into a team... a collection of individuals, into a top - performing whole made up of one unit. Cohesion. What skill is required for this?
I'm guessing the 1st thing is to get off the fact that leadership is about the leader. It's got to be about the people one is leading.
Not a popular thing to do, but a leader must hold people accountable. A leader must hold the vision and keep the integrity up, giving just enough wiggle room for creativity but not enough that people go all "individual." After all, people need guidance. We need feedback. We need to be told, "Hey, you're doing great," or, "Listen, if you need to get that done quicker, how could you do it?" Leaving people alone to fix themselves is a no-no. Take that up a notch and you'll notice how great leaders confront what's not right. They don't allow disagreements or conflicts among team members to fester. They will never tolerate lowered productivity because of lack of courage to assert their values and principles about how things should be run --- for the good of everybody.
Good leaders do not practice favoritism or cronyism. Friendship is different and it does not get in the way.
If you recognize yourself in any of these situations, what will you do to bring improvement to them? How could you meta-state a negative emotion or concept or belief so that a more positive outcome could occur?
For example, disagreements could be meta-stated with respect, tolerance and understanding, patience etc. Meditate on peace and progress. The insights would be invaluable. Then share your thoughts with your team.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Housewife... Are you tired of being treated as if you were dumb and ditzy?
You feel people (even family) don't trust you with stuff --- like renewing insurance policies, proof-reading contracts (even though you have an MBA), redemption of frequent flyer miles, or credit card points.
Ever wonder why there's so much friction, disagreement, conflict, and confusion in your life, in your home, even over little things? Do you sense that even people close to you question your capability or resourcefulness? Do they believe you're a safe pair of hands?
They might see you as a great "cheerleader" --- good at shouting out "Woo Hoo!" or cleaning up the poop at home. But somehow that's where it ends. For "real" work, people always go (husband especially) to someone they perceive as more reliable, more dependable, more effective. And less emotional! Can you blame them?
I know I'm a woman and I should be sticking up for us girls. Actually I am. I'm asking us to cut the BS and grow up. I'm asking us to stop blaming others for what we don't have. I'm asking us to remember who we are, take our power back, and save ourselves. We're meant to be queens not slaves.
Harsh? Perhaps. But girls, we gotta get real. We must work to stay relevant. Especially us past 40. Often we're the ones who don't understand new technology - cyber rules, the new workplace. Our men need a new brand of woman.
I was signing up at the reception table of a big party last weekend and the ladies at the counter were whispering to each other. They were gossiping. You could tell. I handed in my ticket, gave them my money, signed my name in the book and walked into the ballroom. 5 minutes later one of the ushers summoned me back out to the reception table and asked me for my name and money. She did so in the most unfriendly manner possible.
Reception = Welcome. Happy you came. I'm here to help. To receive you.
Right? Apparently not.
Question: Why are women often perceived as "less than?" The weaker sex? Ouch, for someone working to support women's development, that incident hurt me deeply. Who's standing in the way of that lady's happiness? She, herself of course.
Not long ago I met a woman who proudly told me she knew nothing about her family's property and her husband's business. "I'm a lady of leisure," she announced.
Happy for you, I thought. So what you do and your husband talk about apart from the children and the maids? How well do you think you're supporting his needs? Sure you may be one of those "obedient wives" - a whore in bed, a whizz in the kitchen, and a self - sacrificing mother, but what about a partner and companion to a man who could be so pregnant with possibility that all he needs is the right woman to help him give birth to amazing, magnificent innovations that could change the world?
I met her husband. The man couldn't have looked more bored beside her.
Girls, wake up. We have work to do. Our purpose is to save the planet. We are here to raise a new generation of humans --- the kind that is more gentle more kind more loving. Women, wake up from being little girls. We need all hands on board.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
I'm excited! And slightly worried. OTs and I don't get on that well. All that bloody red stuff, you know. Here's hoping I behave.
The crew and I arrive. I can't help thinking I'm slightly overdressed for the part. Everyone else is wearing a frown and hunched either in pain or worry. We are taken upstairs and shown the changing rooms. "Get out of your togs and into scrubs. Here's a cap and face mask while you're at it."
Ok. My turn to wear the frown. It disappears the moment the Prof swings into the lobby. He pulls down his mask and says, "See you in the OT in a few minutes."
Lights. Camera. Action.
There are about a dozen people in there. The patient has a camera stuck down her belly button and the images come up on 3 screens. I can see the child's abdominal cavity ~ the Professor points out the reproductive organs ~ fallopian tubes, ovaries, womb. I can see blood vessels throbbing. Biology come to life. Amazing!
Suddenly the room goes green. My crew and I look at each other. I ask Prof and he says the green light supports vision and helps the medical team see better. Like a war zone, he explains.
The surgeons puncture several little holes for their equipment to be inserted.
Professor singles out the section of the ovary where the incision is to be made and clamps it with his left hand, while with his right, he uses a laser cutter to detach the ovary. 3 snips and it's done.
Hmmm. So these guys are ambidextrous.
All that while talking his team through the procedure. There's the 2nd surgeon on standby to do the other ovary, there's the anaesthetist, there are observers (student doctors I think) from Thailand and Indonesia and about 3-4 nurses. Prof's MO is there too. Pint high but deep voice. Wise. Authoritative. Immediately I warmed to her.
As he hands over to his assistant to take over, Prof says this is one of his easier cases. Laparoscopic surgery is now being done for many other complicated things like open heart surgery, duodenal atresia, and pancreatectomy.
Leaving the OT, I felt a combination of emotion. Firstly relieved for being fit and healthy, then immensely lucky for having been invited to witness innovation in medical science, and grateful for being able to tell my story.
I'll be posting my video of this amazing op on my website soon. So watch this space!
Thursday, February 24, 2011
That's fine if one is retiring age and has a string of wins under one's belt. Not to mention being senior partner at one of the most reputable law firms in town.
What if you were just starting out and more focused on honing your skills in your trade rather than on making yourself stand out for what you were good at? How then would people begin to know what you were capable of?
Many professionals I know resolutely refuse to "sell" themselves. They continue to pick up certificate after certificate, put in hundreds of hours of study, but not to reach out and extend themselves to their "public." Why? Pride, maybe. "I don't do sales. I'm not in marketing. You mean I have to make cold calls ~ be like a car salesman?" they snap as they turn up their nose in judgment and disgust.
Or what, I ask. Remain the best kept secret in town, confusing humility with poverty? They choose to wear their "un-success" like a badge of honor, and all the while, failing to shine bright in their skill and talent. By so doing, depriving so many of their magic.
That's real selfishness, I think. That's confusing humility with ego; because the ego-mind thinks they must keep themselves small and insignificant and not put themselves up and out there in the fore-front of people's minds ~ because that would be calling too much attention to themselves.
It's the perfect excuse to take the easy way out I say. I say that's the best "cop out" strategy. Say nothing, do nothing, be nothing. Go easy. Go safe. Go hide.
For who are we to shine, we think? There must be others more magnificent that ourselves? And so we go, withholding our magic, when we could be sprinkling our "fairy dust" over people and spreading joy, wonder, and love.
How are you holding yourself back today? Why not decide to go out there and shine? Why not choose to live your miracle and demonstrate your magic?
Ok. Thanks for your feedback. I've read through it and wonder if you would point out exactly where you think it should be shortened, and what should be deleted. A quick draft from you would be helpful.
"I don't have time for that. I just think it should be one page.
If you say a word more, I shall have you thumped for your insolence. How dare you talk back at me!"
Talent: I wonder if you had any idea how to make the show
Manager:I think it could be "less heavy." Make it fun.
Talent: Right. Should we talk about that sometime as there's a structure I must follow? I had several ideas
A week later...
Manager:You're fired. We don't really have the show we want.
When you work at something, and especially if you're a volunteer, who isn't compensated for your contribution but give your time freely and willingly, the idea is to support one another because you share a cause. But no. Egos are ever-ready to pounce when separation is threatened. Ego loves exclusiveness, loftiness. Ego is holier-than-thou and wants to prove its specialness. Combination, cooperation, cohesiveness, collaboration seems almost too threatening to its survival.
So the minute it's confronted, it goes into protection mode. "How DARE you!" "Who are you to say that to ME??? Dont you know who I am???"
Watch out for your dragons. The shadow side that runs wild and free. When the beasts escape be prepared to be embarrassed. For who would you wish people to see ~ you or your ego?
Funnily the shadow exposes you ~ your dark side speaks so loud that no words can raise you above the murky mists of your inner black box. Only embracing the truth could set you free.
Why don't bosses have the courtesy and the courage to communicate with us the truth? Why must they soft-pedal and pussy-foot around with our careers? Why do they give us the wrong impression when actually the opposite is true? To avoid confrontation? To cover their backs? To stay popular while they're at their covert operations of shutting you up and shutting you down?
If you stand by your principles... if authenticity and forthrightness is a high value to you, then one can expect to be disillusioned by hypocrisy, feigned loyalty, and double standards. But then the savvy among us would just set as an expectation, the said situations and add this to the cost of "doing business in life." Or shall we speak up?
For far too long, we have been tolerant and docile and submissive. We've turned our face away when our sisters were molested, we've been not-so-innocent bystanders while there was harassment and bullying going on in the workplace. For how long more should we remain silent?
In honour of the spirit in each person, to salute the soul in each other, will you not act for fairness, and justice, and speak up in truth?
What gets to me more than just denting my ego (girls all think we're pretty) is how easily, casually, people pre-judge by outer appearances. We apply labels without thinking what consequence we might cause to those involved.
Looking me up and down, from head to toe, they say, "Big lady" or "Oversized" or "Well-preserved." As if they have any right to comment, taking note of their own attributes ~ which are always sadly lacking! So disappointing. If I must be looked over, at least let it be by a hunk. Ah well, consolation is I am never overlooked.
Like they say: Always easy to see the splinter in someone else's eye or find fault in others. Harder to notice the log in your own.
The point being? I'm making a case for women. Women everywhere are always putting ourselves down, ever-ready to believe we are less than... men. It seems we've been raised, nurtured, cultured to be No2, subservient, agreeable. Even when it doesn't serve us.
The comments that I mentioned? All from men. It seems men have carte blanche ~ they can comment on how we look, look at us as if we were things they could rate on their terms. Well, the good news is... not anymore. Not if we put a stop to it. Not if we take our power back.
Women aren't just about how we look and what we have. We are about who we are. And who we are is often much bigger, better, grander, stronger, more magnificent then our male counterparts.
True. All true. If only we'd remember where we came from, who we are and what we're made of.
This March I dedicate all my effort and energy towards raising awareness for women and our sacrifices. The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.
This weekend I was not only observer to a crash course of this, but I was at the centre of it!
I had joined as a member of a coaching community, only they had failed to inform me that I could never lead it because I didn't come from the same training school they were from. In other words, I was a member without "teeth;" someone with my voice taken away from me, a player who had had her mind paralyzed, unless my thoughts echoed their thoughts.
Mmmm... membership without privileges.
"Oh please stay. We want you with us. You are special." Yeah Yeah. If I stayed, would that make everyone else special too, or just me? What did "special" mean anyway?
Whoa! This was getting wierd. Step back. Step back and think about what's being done here.
Let me see... There's discrimination against other schools of training, other schools of thought. There's protectionism; they're wedging separation, exclusivity between themselves and others. There's labeling: Us = OK. You = Not OK.
Oh but come and play with us, they insist.
I remember someone saying: If you are not with us, you are against us. Wonder who said that and what the aftermath was.
Control is born of... fear. When one is in that type of environment one immediately feels stuck, limited, tense, rigid, tied down. Why do leaders impose control? Fear... of truth, of people being equal and empowered and enabled. What's wrong with that? Back to square one. Self - interest. Self - preservation.
Ahhh... but for how long can a man control another man? How well can you keep someone in chains before something happens that will cause the chains to break and he to breakaway?
For the natural "chain" of events must lead to self-direction, control of one's personal choices, and freedom of expression.
No fear on my part. No need to struggle. Spirit will take care of life.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
I call it conscious incompetence. Suddenly we wake up and know that the old is no longer acceptable. Suddenly whatever was, is no longer workable. When this realization happens, we are no longer the same. We have changed. We have grown. We have outgrown obsolete and outdated ways of being, social structures, social orders. Then things become uncomfortable. Because we seek a new model within which to operate.
What brings on this new awareness? What presents to us the opportunity to look again? To review, to readjust? Some occasions force us to wake up and pay attention. Like crisis. Like rebellion. Like uprising. Like Egypt, Yemen, Syria.
So the world has been made to take notice. Those in power have been forced to step down. Power has shifted from the minorities at the top to the majorities below. More and more it's people power.
How do I know? Look at what's happening with international business, food, and commodity prices. With this global food shortage, who are the ones with the weapons? The ones who produce the food of course! The farmers, the miners, the workers of business, not the businesses themselves... hold the key to quell the world's hunger --- hunger for consumerism (wants), hunger for sustenance (needs) hunger for growth (desires)
If the ridge between the rich and the poor grows wider, who could potentially suffer most? If the US doesn't do something about its illiterate, hardcore poor, immigration policy, what do you think could happen to upset our hierarchy of needs? No one would end up having their safety, security, social, self-esteem, self-actualization needs met because there would be too much chaos for social order and justice systems to survive and thrive.
If India and China don't address the same issue, the same thing could happen to them. And the ripple effect would soon be felt not only across borders but affect future generations.
So I vote we all wake up now and pay attention. Pay close attention to what people are saying and how they are saying it. And sharpen our listening skills.
That means we must work to get ego out of the way
Saturday, February 12, 2011
What stuff do these feelings resonate with in us, that we begin to have thoughts of pain and insecurity? What needs of ours aren't being met when these situations occur?
That we want to feel significant, that we want to be noticed, and to belong is every human being's basic need. Without this we feel unsafe, unwanted, incomplete, inadequate. Without this we are almost in pain.
So what's the point? The point is what our intentions are. The point is how we want people to feel in our presence. Do we intend to make life a party? Or are we intent on dishing out pain?
The biggest shots and best among us are at fault. Have you noticed politicians who can't look you in the eye when they shake your hand. "Gimme your vote, you prick, but I don't really give a rat's ass about you."
Go to a diplomatic function and at the entrance the ushers tell you, "VIPs, turn right. Everyone else go left." Uh... would you kindly define for me the meaning of "VIP" please?
Being a protocol conscious society I understand full well, the titles and references for those with authority. At govt events, it's all pretty standard. But in a hall with clear boundaries... I don't know.
What's the real point? I'm saying think about how you want people to think and feel about you. Every moment you're with others, you're developing your personal brand. You cannot not communicate!
Just observe your breathing around certain people. With some you feel like your back is up. And your breathing becomes quick and shallow around them. With others, you feel totally relaxed. You feel centered. You feel grounded. You feel like yourself.
What is your energy saying about you? About the way you live your life? About the people you're spending time with?
Big question: What type of life do you want?
I offered a job to someone with 4 kids, a wife, a mortgage, and no work. I thought he meant what he said. He said, "I need this job. Life is hard. My family is struggling." So I did what I thought would work. I offered him a salary that would take the worry of money off the table enough so he could focus on doing a good job.
On the 3rd day he turned up an hour late. By the 5th day, he appeared as though he was going to the beach. Only he was stinky, unshaven, and dull. The work didn't get done. In fact, it was worse than before because now I couldn't get to it because I didn't know where stuff was anymore.
Day 10. He texts me to apologize. "I'm off sick," he says. So I tell him, "No need to report back tomorrow, buddy." I'm thinking... go back to whatever it was you came from. Go knock yourself out. Be the person you were meant to be. Hey, don't let me interrupt that!
Sometimes the preachers are mistaken. Sometimes we just can't profile people by generalizing. We may think that's what they need and give it to them. We may even want the best for them --- even more than they want it for themselves. But we forget to consider whatever is working for them in their trough of seeming discontent. There's some kind of secondary gain from being a bum. Something about being unemployed with 5 dependents and bills to pay is making sense to them at some level.
What? Are they illiterate? Schizophrenic? Delusional? Certainly not dumb by any means, that much I know.
As I detach from my association with this person, I send off a prayer in his direction. If not for him, then for the 5 souls who look to him as the head of the household. Peace be with you, my brothers and sisters. That you may know it someday.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
I keep getting feedback from bosses, leaders, directors --- "Keep it simple," they say. "People don't care to think. They want to be cheered up --- from their daily grind. They don't want more work, they want to unwind."
Unfortunately, if there are problems to solve, it doesn't happen at the same place where the problem was formed in the first place. Einstein said, "You can't solve a problem with the same level of thinking that created it."
I'm not sure all people are made of sugar. Would they melt under some heat? I'd prefer to think we're more resilient than that. My main job is to support them in creating their vision. And every good man knows how to turn that vision into reality.
But if we're of the opinion that people will crack under pressure; if we keep underestimating them, their level of understanding, ability to adapt, their passion, and burning desire to improve themselves and their situations, then let everything we do and say be easy.
As easy as a walk in the park.
When stuff is easy and there's as much challenge involved as there is in licking stamps, then where would we be? What does that make us? Where does this take us?
Inherent in all of us is our drive for personal excellence. Take away the need for food, shelter, safety, love and belonging... When we have all these, what then? What fulfills us?
The drive to excel, to be significant, to contribute to something bigger than ourselves.
If we stay on the soft and safe path, if we never leave our comfort zones, if we don't ever feel the stretch, then there's a chance we might say to ourselves, at the dusk of our lives, "What if my whole life was wrong? What if there was stuff I could have done, and I didn't?"
The moral of the story is, there's got to be meaning. Stuff has got to mean enough for us to get up and work up a sweat about. Then we'd feel complete. Then we'd be truly living. Then we'd know fulfillment.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Public speaking is uncomfortable for me. I've had to learn it and even now I am lacking confidence about it. What gets me up there is my passion for sharing my story --- knowing that my experience will help many others overcome their lack of confidence. And so I get up there and make an effort to show that anything is possible.
"Stop making it about you," I say to myself. Never mind the critics. Keep focus on your intentions.
And my intention is not to receive public approval, gather fans, or win a popularity contest.
My intention is to share the magic and miracle of Neuro - Semantic psychology and how staying in control of our attitudes, and the way we look at things, will change the quality of our lives.
There are many events lined up for me in 2011. Although I am concerned that I might not be as good as my trainers, coaches, and mentors, I know that all I need to be is my best. And I will give my all to be at my very best. This is my commitment --- to myself, and my work to inspire the courage, confidence, and freedom so that we live our best life.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Whether we like it or not, we live in an "entanglement" economy --- where one nation's prosperity is inter - connected to another nation's performance. The theme, agree or not, must be "prosper thy neighbor." Or all may perish.
With the US and Europe in financial turmoil, India and China (and other emerging markets) are on the rise --- from overtaking the US and Japan as the world's largest exporters, the world's largest consumers; and the rest of the world have no choice but to sit up and pay attention. What else can we do? Drop out of orbit?
Corruption, commercial breach of trust, nuclear and biological warfare, ecological disasters swirling all around us... what will you and I do about that if the intention is evolution?
I see this as an opportunity for readjustment, for balancing the karmic scales. Western civilization is proving to be obsolete in its approach towards evolution; its practices catastrophic by result - through misuse of power --- eroding the people's trust and confidence. What have Hank Poulsen, Bernanke, Tim Geithner, Alan Greenspan achieved so far, if not to add insult to injury?
Now is the time we have to re-examine and work through our social, economic, political, cultural, and religious structures --- for transformation. We want to create new "spirit" and build up a new society based on new foundations of human thinking and doing.
But first we must be free of our tribal traditions; lose the ego-mind, and come back to our senses.
What are we fighting for? Do we want intellectual, military power? Something to crusade against? Do we need another industrial revolution? Where one culture's strength rises above others and domination occurs? How do we get to achievement, progress, morality, citizenship, and ultimately --- freedom? By passing more laws?
After all this, how much more do we know? This depends on how we see. How we see goes to form our attitudes and our attitudes go to shape our behavior.
What is our identity? Is it that of a harmonious, collective, cohesive society or clusters of tribes led by warlords? They say the leadership of any society is the community's manifestation of its aspirations.
Let's see. If this is so, then we are the movers and shakers, the shape-shifters of our time. We will create our destiny. Dynamic or destructive. Creative or conniving.
We can choose "quantum leap" or humanity's catastrophe.
I opt for life. What about you?
Sometimes you can see the shift coming; sometimes it happens within seconds -- like a tsunami.
Not prepared, it can claim lives.
The trick is to be alert and stay ready. As ready as possible.
Here's the scary truth. Our vision --- what we can see at any given moment --- is limited by our interpretations. The moment we assign meanings to events in our lives -- is the moment we limit our view of reality. So we gotta manage our meanings.
What do some of the recent happenings mean? There's been natural catastrophes --- the flooding in Queensland, Brazil, and China. Earthquakes in Chile, Haiti, Indonesia. Draught in Russia. Heatwaves in India. Volcanic ash in Iceland and all over Europe. Snow in London --- in fact the coldest weather in 20 years!
There's political chaos in Egypt, Tunisia, and the Ivory Coast in Africa. Soon to be general elections in Malaysia
There's been the sub-prime crisis, the "Bernie Madoff embarrassment" --- which brought on the financial crash on a global scale and is forcing the restructuring of the markets. Mega economies such as the EU and the US are in shambles and still picking up the pieces. How is this all possible, even fathomable? With bigwigs the likes of Alan Greenspan, Hank Paulson, Bernanke, Tim Geithner --- those brainy billionaire bankers at the helm???
Is greed good? Are we being punished for apportioning the wrong meanings? What's the lesson to learn here? Is this a directive from the universe to live a different type of life? If so, what type?
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Without rare earth we would not be able to produce iPods, iPads, tinted glass, goggles, medical equipment, laser beams, missile defense systems, weapons --- the list is endless. You can do without gold, but rare earth has no substitute.
China is now holding 970Billion worth of US treasuries (debt). Tim Geithner US Treasury Secretary is now in Davos campaigning so that countries will keep on buying and will not liquidate US Treasuries. Ouch, wouldn't like to be in his shoes.
This week Standard & Poor, the US rating agency downgraded Japan's sovereign rating to AA- (the 4th highest level). Japan has faced economic recession for the past 2 decades. The paradox is that the Americans themselves have a budget deficit of 2-over trillion dollars and yet America has a triple A credit rating! Go figure!
The theme of our discussion is economic strength. China has it.
Nowadays I don't know about America. I'm sure they know how to take care of themselves. What about Malaysia?
The key factors driving global economic progress today are rare earth elements, commodities, food, and oil and gas. This is a fact.
Malaysian commodities are doing well what with the price of rubber products and palm oil increasing. For how long?
Oil and Gas has been big for Malaysia, with Petronas and all. But our supplies are running low. And because the world now wants clean energy ,what we actually need to produce is natural gas.
So how do we get natural gas? From coal-bed methane, sandstones, methane hydrates, and shale. The technology involved with drilling shale is horizontal drilling and hydraulic fracturing.
Using this technology, and according to the (US Energy Information Administration) EIA Annual Energy Outlook 2011, the US has 2.552 trillion cubic feet of potential natural gas resources. From this 828 trillion cubic feet is natural gas from shale resources and this amount of shale gas can last the US for 110 years.
Where is Malaysia on this score? What do we do about all that???
Oil field services sector is slated for phenomenal growth because these companies are needed for expertise in drilling for shale gas. Who are the top such companies? Schlumberger, Halliburton. Both from the US of A.
Why do I care about this? Call it national pride. I want to be proud to be Malaysian.
Last year PM Najib launched the NEM (New Economic Model) where he expounded how Malaysia is to become a high income economy as opposed to it being a just low-cost manufacturing hub. That's where perception currently sits and as PM cum Finance Minister, Najib aims not only to change, but transform.
Malaysia will also host the FORBES CEO Global Conference Sept 12 - 14. Here Team Malaysia led by MIDA and Bursa Malaysia is set to review the deliverables - results from implementation of the ETP.
All this very important for the ruling govt in terms of credibility. Last year 30 Mar 2010 PM Najib launched NEM and spoke about Malaysia competing globally in the financial markets. It was then that Goldman Sachs was invited to set up shop in Malaysia and a host of other liberalizations announced. Talent Corp, Innovation Centres --- all strategies to grow and sustain.
Then what? So what?
So that... the public feel confident, FDI keeps growing, the people's needs, wants, and desires are responded to. Our need for safety and security --- physical safety (there is law and order and justice), psychological safety (knowing our voices will be heard and human rights protected), financial and economic security --- that will last not just for our time but for our children and their children.
Yes, so all eyes on Najib, his govt, and ETP deliverables. It's a big idea. Definitely an idea worth supporting. It means jobs, it means quality of life, it means peace
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Because while they may be expert and skilled, they have not balanced this know-how with
other determining factors for success, namely how to drive their business; how to build that singularity between passion, performance, potential and profit.
Book Yourself Solid is a workshop that will help you create strategies for growth
by addressing the need for networking, sales, marketing, branding and promotions,
in terms of increasing top-of-mind recall for what you do, increasing your suitability as a collaborative partner and keeping you booked solid as a self - employed professional.
Say you have a miracle cure for something. And because your product is intangible,
you find it difficult to communicate it's value and benefits to your prospects. Let's call the product "self - actualization." Other descriptions include "personal mastery," "laser-beam focus,"
and "peak experiences." What do you do? You talk to as many people as you can.
You talk enthusiastically till you're blue in the face. Fine. Only trouble with that is, you're on a time-line. While you talk, you have bills to pay. While you keep up with your material, working to improve and raise your competency, your energy is waning --- why, because you aren't drawing in enough participants into your trainings or clients into your coaching programs.
The easiest to think would be, "what's wrong with me?"
Funny thing about people is, they are all about themselves. They make decisions based on what they want and how urgently they think they need them. Oftentimes it's not about us at all but so often we fail to persist, we give up because we confuse "them and us." And remember, the only thing we have control over is ourselves.
So step 1: Manage your Self.
There's a whole psychology attached to this but this is not the focus of my presentation
Step 2: Branding, Marketing, Selling, Promoting, Networking is the conventional way to spread one's message. Unless something else is invented on the planet that serves the purpose, it's good that we pay attention to its principles.
I know of those who are dead against this --- like lawyers and other professionals who believe that marketing is tacky. Here's the thing. Marketing is simply about differentiating yourself and what you do from what others do. One doesn't have to feel cheap doing this.
My MO is: Never be afraid of the truth. So if it's true, why not tell it? Tell people all the ways you are good --- and different. Teach them how to see and feel as you do. Share with them the value and benefits you can bring to them. Show them how to be discerning while making their choices.
Why make it about you? It's about your public. It's about your client. Coaching is a helping profession, so help.
Networking is all the buzz nowadays. Social networking even more. Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn. I barely know what's what. But hey. Pick up the lingo. Go with the flow. Connect and conquer. Connect and convert.
What's stopping you? Are you afraid of rejection? I'd rather think we're afraid of success. Wait till we hit it big. And we will, no doubt, because our product is superior in every way.
For more on my presentation, you'll just have to come to Colorado this July
The 1st ever International Neuro-Semantics Conference in the world
Larry leads bilateral trade, investment and good relations between Malaysia - Australia from Aussie-land and Michael (who is British) leads
out from Malaysia.
My portfolio in the whole game is Media, Communications & PR. This photo was taken at a press interview about what our business council actually does and what outcomes we hope to achieve by the end of 2011.
PM Najib is expected to travel to Australia this March and the Malaysia-Australia Business Council will organize a trade and investment conference in conjunction with his trip. MABC will lead a trade delegation and conduct social and business matching activities for both parties.
Not only to promote business links but MABC plays the role of mediator, facilitator, and advocate between business, industry, and govt. In an ever increasingly competitive global market situation, every little bit of help becomes important. That little bit of "edge" and leverage can put you head and shoulders way ahead of others.
It's all about being our best, isn't it? That's what's important about life.
In the end, it's all about what you will be remembered for.
This July 1 -3, in Grand Junction Colorado, 22 Neuro-semantic trainers, leaders, and Meta-Coaches will be presenting to the theme of: Actualizing Excellence.
The conference will have 3 tracks ---  Business  Personal Development  Coaching. It all boils down to  Skills and Competency development  Self Mastery  Business sense.
Neuro-semantic coaches and trainers are ranked highest in the world in terms of all three, thus making us the most sought-after, highly paid, most illustrious performers in our category anywhere in the world.
Michael Hall PhD, the founding father of Neuro-semantics holds incredibly high values around the development of what he calls the "community" of Neuro-semanticists. Camaraderie, professionalism, cooperation --- are hallmarks of the International Society of Neuro-Semantics.
Neuro-Semantics trainers and coaches today work at actualizing excellence in the fields of sports, business and entrepreneurship, leadership, human resource and organizational development, entertainment, negotiation and facilitation.
Neuro-semantics trainers and coaches are in the business of managing change and producing peak performance, facilitating through transitions, strengthening identity, and developing talent and competence.
Is your life made up of peak experiences?
Are you living your best life?
If not, it's time to find out more about neuro-semantics and the psychology of self-actualization
Go to www.self-actualizing.org